


The Auction

by anephemeralmind



Category: Call Me By Your Name (2017) RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Radio, Fluff, M/M, Nipple Piercings, dude idk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-16
Updated: 2019-10-16
Packaged: 2020-12-20 18:49:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,456
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21061466
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anephemeralmind/pseuds/anephemeralmind
Summary: Armie and his radio co-hosts are hosting a 100 hour livestream for charity, where they do various challenges to raise as much money as possible, Timmy has been invited to be one of the guest hosts.After seeing what the other guest hosts had been put through, he didn’t have that high hopes, but when the first thing that happens is him getting his nipples pierced, he figured the worst is over.He was wrong.





	The Auction

It was safe to say that Timmy didn’t know what he’d agreed to. Guest host a charity livestream for 24 hours, they said. It’ll be fun, they said. It’s for a great cause, they said.

But they fucking forgot to mention that it was Armie Hammer’s show. Armie Hammer who Timmy had been nurturing a secret crush on since the first time he interviewed him well over three years ago.

And now he was going to spend 24 hours, locked in a small studio with him. Sure, there’d be other people there as well – the other hosts, show producers, the camera operators, assistants and so on – but Timmy didn’t really care about any of them, he really only cared about Armie.

He’d been asked in advance what his greatest fears were, if there was anything he absolutely _did not_ want to do, and he’d known that one of the things he said was definitely going to be something he would have to do – but it was for charity, and he was prepared for that. Or, at least, he liked to think he was.

What he was not prepared for, and honestly would never be prepared for, was Armie Hammer.

They’d already been streaming for 48 hours when Timmy’s 24 hours were due to start, and he’d found himself losing quite a few hours watching the stream online during the last couple of days. So far they’d raised nearly $300 000, and to achieve that, Armie had been forced to eat a raw steak, and pierce his nipples. Ashton had to shave his hair and beard off, and Tyler had to do 150 push ups while singing along to Africa by Toto.

Their other guest hosts hadn’t been saved from the fire; Saoirse Ronan – who was deathly afraid of the dark, had been forced to go explore an old church, looking for a ‘treasure’ in the dark, alone. Zendaya, who hated needles, had to get a tattoo of Armie’s initials on her ankle, and as if that wasn’t bad enough – Armie was the one tattooing her.

So he knew that whatever the challenges they’d cooked up for him, there was no getting off easy.

Entering the studio, the first thing that hit him was the smell, and it suddenly became extremely clear that there’d been three grown men hanging out in there for 48 hours without showering. But he’s sure he’d get used to it quickly enough, if nothing else, the different challenges awaiting him would for sure distract him.

“Here he is!” Armie crows into the microphone, while Ashton pats him on the back and hands him a pair of headphones. “Welcome to the madhouse, Timmy. Do you think you’re ready for this?” Armie wiggles his eyebrows, and Tyler snorts into his microphone.

“Thanks.” Timmy laughs, putting the headphones on. “I’ve been keeping track of your challenges so far, and… I’m a little worried, I can’t lie.”

The wicked grins that Ashton and Tyler send his way doesn’t make him feel any better, but Armie just shrugs. “Dude, I got my nipples pierced and I tattooed my initials on Zendaya, so I think we might have blown our loads a little early with the big stuff. It might not be _that_ bad.”

Ashton lets out a giggle, and Armie’s eyebrow goes up. “Or… What do you guys have planned?”

“Nothing.” Tyler smiles innocently, making Armie narrow his eyes. Timmy can’t stop himself from huffing out a laugh, while shaking his head.

“At least the nipple piercings are already done.” He shrugs, but then Armie’s eyes lights up with mischief, and he regrets ever opening his mouth.

“Ooooh! You never said anything about not wanting to get pierced? I’m sure we could throw in a bonus challenge, just for you, right?” Armie looks over at one of the producers in the corner who just shrugs, and Timmy feels his heart fall out of his ass. “Yes, Lil’ Timmy Tim! We’re gonna start you off hard!” Armie cackles, and Tyler laughs so hard he has to excuse himself and go off set in order not to disturb the broadcast.

“Did you hear that? What’s up for offer is nipple piercings for our lovely Timmy Chalamet.” Ashton laughs, and Armie gets up to stand behind Timmy, grabbing his shoulders.

“All we’re asking for,” Armie leans over Timmy to speak into his mic. “is… What should we set as a sum?” He asks, looking over at the producer again. “Same as when we did it to me? That’s fair isn’t it? So, lovely people watching, and listening, if you raise $5000 in the next half hour, our cute little Timmy Chalamet here will get one nipple pierced. But if you manage $10.000 before the hour is up, it’ll be _both_ of them.”

“Oh, man.” Tyler comes back in and pats Timmy on the back. “I’m sorry. We were supposed to start you off small, your original first challenge was just gonna be like, eat 15 hot dogs. But apparently we’re doing piercings instead.”

Timmy shakes his head and laughs a little hysterically to himself, because he knows there’s no way they’re not gonna raise the money, and he only has about one hour left of being unpierced. “I guess it’s good to learn this lesson early.” Timmy chuckles, rolling his eyes and looking over at Tyler. “Never try to be clever.”

Armie gives his shoulders a squeeze and leans over him to speak into the microphone again. “It’ll be alright Timmy Tim, I’ll hold your hand through it.”

“Of course you will.” Ashton mumbles into his microphone, making Tyler cackle, while Armie walks up to him and hits him over the head. “Ouch! What’d you do that for?”

“Be nice.” Armie reprimands him, but there’s a light blush on his cheeks that Timmy doesn’t really understand.

Over the next hour, Ashton and Tyler keep begging the audience to give as much as they can, so that Timmy can join Armie in the pierced nipple club. They play him a Kid Cudi song right before they reveal whether they’ve reached the goal or not, because Ashton wanted him to have a tiny moment of happiness.

“It’s time,” Armie says as the last tunes of Cudi’s song fade out. “Have we raised enough to get Lil’ Timmy’s nipple pierced?”

Timmy had known that as soon as he’d let that old nickname drop during the interview process, that it was going to come back to bite him, so he wasn’t really surprised at all that it seemed to be the only thing he was gonna be called for the next 24 hours.

He crossed his fingers beneath the desk, hoping against hope that they were going to come up short.

“We said that if you raised $5000 in half an hour, Timmy would get one nipple pierced, and I am very pleased to announce that yes!” Ashton lifts his fist in victory, and Timmy hides his face in his hands as he groans. “We got that first hurdle down, so we’re getting at least one nipple done!”

“But, the question remains.” Tyler continues, “did we get enough for both?”

Armie gets up and stands behind Timmy again, gripping his shoulders tightly as Tyler looks over at them and grins. “Let’s see!” Armie reaches over Timmy’s shoulder, to hit the button to reveal the total score.

Timmy closes his eyes, not wanting to see the number on the screen, but when everyone in the room erupts into victorious applause, he knows they did it – and that he’s about to get both his nipples pierced.

“Fuck.” He whispers to himself, and Armie hugs him tightly from behind before ruffling his curls.

“It’s gonna be fine, Timmy.” Armie whispers into his ear, only for him to hear, his warm husky voice makes a shiver run down Timmy’s spine. “I’ll be there every step of the way, okay? And you can take them out tomorrow if you want.”

“Please.” Timmy whispers, and Armie gives his shoulder another squeeze.

“Is the piercing studio ready?” Armie calls out to the producer, who nods. “Okay, good. Timmy? Take my hand.” Not needing to be told twice, Timmy grips Armie’s hand with everything he’s got.

He lets Armie support him all the way out to the car, where as soon as he sits down, all the air wooshes out of his lungs and he lets his eyes fall closed.

“Are you okay?” Armie asks quietly, and Timmy nods.

“Yeah, it’s just…” Timmy shrugs, opening one eye and looking up at Armie’s worried face. “Adrenaline, I think.” Armie nods, and pulls Timmy closer, letting him rest his head against his shoulder.

They arrive at the piercing studio way too quickly, and next thing Timmy knows, he’s shirtless, lying down in a clingfilmed chair, clutching onto Armie’s hand for dear life while a heavily tattooed man holds a needle to his nipple.

“Are we live?” Armie asks the camera guy, who shakes his head before holding his hand up and counting down. “Okay! Here we are, live from the piercing studio, which, I didn’t think I’d be back here this quickly.” Armie laughs, obviously trying his best to make Timmy feel more comfortable and get his mind off of what’s about to happen.

“Now, Timmy, you ready?” Timmy closes his eyes and nods, squeezing Armie’s hand as he feels the cold metal of the needle touching his nipple.

“We’re gonna need you to take a deep breath.” The piercing artist says, “and when I tell you, you breathe out. Okay?” Timmy nods, and sucks in a deep breath just as he was told.

“Aaaaand breathe out.” Just as he starts exhaling the needle goes clean through his nipple, and he lets out a pained groan.

“One down, just one to go.” Armie says quitely, smiling down at him as Timmy cranes his neck to look up at him. Armie carefully pushes Timmy’s hair off of his forehead, and leans in to whisper “you’re doing really well.”

Way too quickly, the piercing artist is back with a new needle, and they do the whole thing all over again. Luckily, Timmy’s brain is so full of endorphins from getting the first nipple done, he barely feels the second one, but looking down at his chest, where he’s suddenly got two pierced nipples, he can’t stop himself from letting out a hysterical laugh.

“Oh man.” He cackles, sitting up carefully and rubbing his eyes. “My mom is gonna kill me.”

Back in the studio, he laughed in disbelief as he had to show his newly pierced nipples to the camera, and then Tyler had the genius idea to have Armie take his shirt off too, so they could take a picture for their Instagram.

Timmy had expected that 24 hours would feel like half an eternity, but when he came back from his 5 hour scheduled rest, and there was only 7 hours left, he felt strangely disappointed. Despite the nipple piercing, he’d had a lot of fun, especially when the next challenge had been that Tyler had to get a monk haircut.

It got even better when Timmy got to be the one to give it to him. He’d had way too much fun giving Tyler a bowl cut, and when the time came to shave the top of his head, he’d been unable to stop himself from cackling.

Armie had been asleep at the time, so when he came back after, to find Tyler with his new hairstyle and Timmy grinning like the cat who got the cream, he’d laughed so hard he nearly fell over, giving Timmy a high five for a job well done.

“Yes, you’re laughing, now.” Tyler had said, narrowing his eyes at them. “But, just you wait, I’ll get you back.”

Timmy hadn’t really taken that threat too seriously, figuring that since he’d already gotten his nipples pierced, there wasn’t much else they could hit him with at this point. But then, a couple of hours later, when Ashton came back from his nap, Tyler cleared his throat and looked over at Timmy and Armie with an evil grin.

“Everyone who has been listening to our show for a while, and all of you guys who have been with us for the last 68 hours, you’ll know that our boy Armie here, he has got _quiiiiite_ the crush…” Tyler cuts himself off with a laugh as Armie’s eyes go wide and a blush starts making its way onto his face. “Oh man, look at him, so cute.”

Ashton takes over when it becomes clear that Tyler is never going to be able to finish his intro, with a grin, Ashton pats Armie on the back. “Yes, we _aaaaaalllll_ know about this crush. Well, almost everyone, I think there’s only one person left in the world who doesn’t know about it at this point, and that is our lovely lil’ Timmy Tim.”

Tyler, Ashton and Armie all turn to look at him at the same time – Ashton and Tyler with matching wicked grins, and Armie, looking a little like he’s about to pass out.

“What?” Timmy squeaks out, and Tyler lets out another cackle, before getting up and going over to Timmy, ruffling his hair.

“Yes! It’s true. Armie has got a big fat lesbian crush on you!” Tyler laughs, and Armie lets out a loud groan and lets his forehead hit the desk in front of him.

Ashton joins Tyler in laughter, but extends his hand to slowly rub Armie’s back as he grins into the microphone. “So naturally, our next challenge is going to celebrate that crush, but we’re going to up the ante a little bit. We’re not going to ask for 10k this time, no, we’re doubling it, we want 20k in the next hour, and if you guys manage that, Tyler, what will happen then?”

Armie raises his head to look over at Timmy, who is staring wide eyed back at him, up until that exact moment he’d thought they were just joking – that there was no way that Armie had a crush on him, too – but it’s all there in Armie’s eyes for him to see.

“Well, well, well!” Tyler grins, giving Timmy’s shoulders a final squeeze before going back to his seat. “If you guys manage to raise 20k in the next hour, we’re going to make Armie’s dreams come true – he’s going to get to kiss our lovely little Timo!”

As soon as Tyler finishes speaking, Armie shakes his head. “No, you can’t, seriously, no. You can’t force that on him, that’s not right.”

“Why not?” Ashton frowns, “it’s just a kiss. He’s an actor, he kisses people all the time.”

“That’s not the same.” Armie argues, running a hand through his hair, looking more than a little stressed. “This isn’t right, you can’t do this.”

“Why don’t we just ask Timmy how he feels?” Tyler shrugs, turning to look at Timmy, who just stares back at him, unable to say anything at all.

“What do you think, Timo? Is kissing Armie worth 20,000 dollars?” Ashton asks with a gentle smile.

Tyler seems to notice that he’s a little freaked out as well, and quickly adds, “It’s fine if you don’t actually want to, we meant this to be a prank challenge for Armie, if you genuinely don’t want to do it, you can say no.”

“No.” Timmy whispers, swallowing deeply as he sees Armie nod to himself, looking a little disappointed, obviously thinking it was the challenge Timmy was saying no to. Clearing his throat, he looks over at Tyler and smiles “I mean, I don’t mind, you can… I’ll do it, if we raise enough money, I’ll kiss him. I’ll kiss Armie.”

“Oh.” Armie says dumbly, while Tyler and Ashton both let out a roar of victory.

Even before the result is announced, Timmy knows they’ve raised more than enough, because the producers all seem extremely excited, and the closer the reveal get, the louder the buzzing behind the curtains seem to become.

“Alright.” Tyler starts, as the latest song fades out. “It’s time. The question we’ve all been asking ourselves for the last hour – have you raised enough money to make Armie’s dream of kissing Timmy come true?”

While Armie shakes his head, blushing bright red, Ashton looks down at his computer screen with a wide grin. “We asked for 20k, now, lets see how much you’ve raised!”

Timmy chews nervously on his bottom lip as he waits for the number to pop up on his screen. When it does, his jaw drops.

“Holy shit.” Armie whispers, as Ashton and Tyler both let out a loud yell and starts jumping up and down.

“You did it!!!!” Ashton shouts, holding his hands over his head in victory. “You fucking legends! We asked for 20k, you raised 80!”

Timmy looks over at Armie, and when their eyes meet, they both let out a nervous chuckle. That was a lot of fucking money, and a lot of people wanting them to kiss.

“I think,” Tyler starts, grinning widely, and Timmy already knows he’s about to suggest something to make this whole situation even worse. Or better, depending on how you view it. “I think, since we got 60 thousand more than we asked for, that you owe the people tongue.”

Ashton starts to laugh immediately, letting out a wheezy “yes!” as Armie immediately shakes his head. When they turn to look at him, Timmy just shrugs.

“I mean, if we’re first going to kiss, might as well do it properly.” He takes himself a little bit by surprise, agreeing so quickly, but he was looking forward to it now.

He’d wanted to kiss Armie for going on three years, so to be able to do it now, under the guise of it strictly being for charity – well, fuck it, he was going to get as much out of it as possible, because when else would he get this chance?

Tyler, Ashton and the camera crew all start chanting “Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!” at the same time, and Armie guides Timmy, with a hand to his lower back, out into the center of the studio, right in front of the camera’s.

“Are you sure about this?” Armie whispers, cupping Timmy’s cheek.

“Yeah.” Timmy croaks out, feeling his eyes start to flutter shut as Armie leans in closer.

At the first touch of their lips, Timmy lets out a quiet groan, and Armie takes that chance to slip his tongue into his mouth.

Armie’s hands slide back to bury themselves in Timmy’s curls, and when he gives them a little tug, Timmy completely forgets that people are watching and bites down on Armie’s bottom lip, making him gasp before he moans into Timmy’s mouth.

Feeling the vibrations of Armie’s moan rumble against his chest, and his lips, Timmy’s hands slide up from his chest to rest against Armie’s neck, deepening the kiss even further. 

As Armie's tongue rubs against his own, Timmy feels himself start to grow hard, and when Armie pushes his thigh between his legs, Timmy grinds down on it gratefully.

“Okay!” Tyler suddenly calls out, coughing lightly to try and cover his laughter. “I think that’s enough for now.” He winks over at them as they separate.

“Forgot we were here, eh?” Ashton cackles, rubbing his hands together in glee. “Ah, you’re so cute.”

The rest of Timmy’s time as a guest host was spent just shooting the shit and playing music, if he and Armie were flirting a little more openly, well, making out in front of everyone was quite the ice breaker.

When it became time for Timmy to leave, Armie walked out with him. “I’d like to take you out on a date.” Armie whispers, looking down at Timmy with a nervous smile. “Do you… I mean, is that, do you want, uh – would you want to go out with me?”

“I’d love to.” Timmy breathes out, grinning widely as Armie lets out a sigh of relief, before slowly leaning down for a kiss.

The next week, out on their first official date, Armie takes his hand and laces their fingers together. “I have a confession to make.”

Giving Armie’s hand a little squeeze, Timmy looks up at him from underneath his eyelashes.“Oh?”

“Yeah.” Armie whispers, licking his lips, smiling a little sheepishly. “I donated 10k out of my own pocket that day, just so I’d be able to kiss you.”

“Yeah?” Timmy smiles, feeling a light blush make its way across his cheeks. “I donated a couple thousand, too.”

“Really?” Armie squeaks, and Timmy nods, laughing a little to himself.

“You were worth every penny.”

**Author's Note:**

> Idk how many of you guys out there are norwegian, if there are any of you at all, but this fic is very much based on a real charity livestream. Once a year, 4 radio hosts, put on a 100 hour livestream to raise money for charity - and they do all kinds of dumbass challenges to raise as much as possible. Basically everything I mentioned in this fic, as far as challenges go, except the make out session naturally, has happened for real on this livestream. 
> 
> So, since it's that time of year again, and I'm about to spend the next 100 hours in front of the tv - what better time to write this fic? 
> 
> If for some reason, you guys want to watch the livestream too, you can do that [here](https://p3.no/). 
> 
> I hope, despite the weirdo premise, you had fun with this silly little thing, and come chat with me on tumblr if you want @anephemeralmind over there too ❤️❤️


End file.
